Soldier Message

A newly married and desperate

soldier sends a hand grenade

to his mother-in-law, with

a note :

" Dear Sasu ji, if you pull this ring,

I'll be able to get 3 days leave..!!

Shakespeare Message

Shakespeare :

We make 100 mistakes daily

but we don't hate our self,

and others make only 1

mistake &

we hate them in a second !!

Someone Message

Someone is nothing,

to be loved by someone is

something,

but to be loved by the one

you love is everything.

Be Blessed :)

Winter Message

Hold your right cheek with your

right hand & hold your left

cheek with your left hand !!

You know what it is ?

Meri taraf se

Koochi kocchi ku :)

Happy Winter Days :)

Cockroach Message

2 cockroach ICU mein aik dosre

ke barabar mein admit the.

1st : Kisne maara ?

2nd : Koi nahi re,

aik larki mujhe dekh ke itni

zor se chillai ke mujhe heart attack

agaya :D

Pathan Message

Sabzi wala sabzi par paani

chidak raha tha,

kaafi dair hogai tab aik

pathan ghusse se bola :

Bhai sahab ! Agar bhindi ko

hosh aa gaya ho to aik kilo

de do. ;p

Mom-Son Message

Aik larka ghar dair se lauta.

Maa : Kahan they ?

Beta : Emotional film

dekhne gaya tha :
" Maa ka Pyaar."

Maa : Ab andar jaa ke

acton film dekh :

Baap ki Maar.

Son-Dad Message

Son : Papa main itna jawaan

kab honga ke main mama ko

bina bataye ghar se bahar

ja sakoon ?

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Papa : Beta, itna jawaan to

abhi tak main bhi nahi hua. :) ;p :D

Allah Message

Lot of things go

Unquestioned

&

A lot of questions go

Unanswered.

Few words go

Unsaid

&

Few go

Unheard.

Some dreams are born

Dead

&

Some are buried

Alive.

Some flowers grow best in the

sun, others do well in the shade !

Allah always knows what is

best for us. So, He puts us where

we grow the best.

Always hope for the best and

Trust the Almighty Allah.

He is everywhere and never

let anyone alone.

Animals Message

If animals have FB, these are

most likely to be their status

updates...

Cockroach : Managed to skip

from someone's foot step. Man,

I lead a dangerous Lifestyle ! ;p

Cat : My 7th child is asking

who is her dad. What shall I tell

her ? I don't even remember ! :D

Mosquito : I am HIV positive, this

is all due to wrong sucking !! ;/

Chicken : if tomorrow i am not

updating my status, means I am

being served at KFC. Love you

all <3.

Octopus : I have just refilled

my ink... Hurrey !! ^_^

Pig : Oh gosh they throw the

gossip that i am spreading

flu... WTF !! :X

Goat : Friends, don't go out.

Eid holiday is coming. :'(

Pig writes a comment on goat's

status : Luckily I am Haram.

| 4 Likes |

Goat replies : Don't you remember

that after Eid, the Chinese

new year ?

| 1000 Likes | :D :p

Attachment Message

When attachment dies in a 

relationship...

Formalities are born !!

And when formalities are born,

nothing remains in the

relationship.

Keep your relations free

from Formal ways !!

Morning Message

Moon is upset and

Sun is happy.

Because,

Moon is going to miss you

and

Sun is waiting to see you.

So,

Have a sweet and lovely

morning.

Frogs Message

Two frogs sitting together :

1st : Trrrrr.

2nd : Trrrrr.

1st : trrrr.

2nd : Trrrrr.

1st : Tarartrrrrr.

2nd : Look bro ! Don't change the topic ;p

Recover Message

5 things you cannot recover

in Life :

Stone after thrown

Word after said

Occasion after missed

Time after gone

and

Trust after lost...!!!

Newton Message

Newton's wife to Newton :

How am I looking ?

Newton : Tan c/sin c

Wife : What ?

Newton : Tan c/sin c

=(sin c/cos c) sin c

=1/cos c

=sec c ;p

Question Message

A question asked in a Talent Test :

If you are married to 1 of

the twin sisters, how would

you recognize your Wife ?

The best answer :

Why the hell should I recognize ? 

=p

Girl-Boy Message

1 larki road pe khari thi,

1 larka samne se bike par

guzra phir wapis aya aur

usse pocha :

Pehchana kya ?

Girl : Nahi.

Boy : Kya yaar abhi to samne

se gaya tha :D

Funny Message

Cheel urri

Kawwa urra

Mena urri

Chirya urri

Monkey urra

Oops !!

Sorry yaar jaldi mein tujhe bhi

urra diya.

Chal aja wapis aja.

Girls Message

Dear Girls,

If you think your Dad,

Mom, Teacher, Boss

are strict and harsh with you...

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Wait for a Husband.

You would Love them all ;p

Officer Message

Police Officer : Sir, I am

extremely sorry to say, but your

wife has been involved in a fatal

car crash and we would like you to

come with us so you can identify

the dead body.

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Husband : Ahh... I am bit busy

right now. Can't you take a photo

and tag me on Facebook. If its

her, I will click "LIKE."

:D

Funny Message

Aisa admi jo ghalti pe ho aur

maafi maang le usey

" Aqalmand "

kehte hain aur

Aisa shakhs jo ghalti pe bhi

na ho magar phir bhi maafi

maang le usey

" Husband "

kehte hain :D

Love Message

Uski dharkan se zindagi ka

rishta hai mera,

Wo zindagi ka ek ehem

hissa hai mera,

Ye mohabbat usse sirf 

lafzon ki nahi,

Uski rooh se rooh ka

rishta hai mera.

KBC Message

On the set of KBC...

A guy got stuck on a Rs. 1

crore question. He uses 

phone a friend Lifeline and

chooses his girlfriend to ask

the answer.

Amitabh : Hey ! You have got 30

seconds to answer and your

time starts now.

Boy reads out the question

and options.

Girl : Mil gaya time tumhein

phone karne ka,

mujhe tumse koi baat nahi

karni, bye !! ;p :D

Islamic New Year Message

Today's sunset is the last

sunset of this Islamic Year &

I pray that all your worries 

set down with this sunset &

new beam of new year spread

Happiness in your Life.

Aameen.

Happy New Islamic Year 1433.

Officer Message

Officer to drunk guy :

How high are you ?

Drunk guy : No officer, its :

" Hi ! How are you ?" ;p :D

Pathan Message

Pathan creates new email id :

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gmail@pathan.com

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hacker dies,

virus cries,

google shocks,

computer blocks,

Pathan rocks :D

Water Message

Don't drink water while

studying...

Because,

Chemistry says :

" Concentration decreases

when you add water." ;p :D

Word Message

Remember these two words.

It will open many doors in Life...

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1- Push

&

2- Pull :D

Life Message

When your absence does not

alter someone's Life,

then accept the reality that

your presence has no meaning

in their Life.

Stupid Message

Intehai  Farigh Shair Arz kiya hai :

Main hoon Jerry, Tum ho Tom

Wah Wah ...

Main hoon Jerry, Tum ho Tom

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www.google.com :D

Lesson Message

The perfect Lesson which I

got from Life :

" Don't be too Honest in this

World...

Because straight tress are

always chosen first

for cutting."

Friend Message

One one

2

I miss you.

Two two

4

Miss me more.

Three three

6

Friendship is fix.

Four four

8

You are great.

Five five

10

I miss you

my Sweet Friend :)

Funny Message

Out Class Ghazal... :D

Aaj apni mohabbat ko naya

morr diya usne,

Paas bula ke chal be nikal

bol diya usne.

Pehle hansta tha main mun

khol ke,

Ab to agey wala hi daant torr

diya usne.

Usne sargoshi ka kaha main

betaab ho gaya,

Kaan paas kiya to maror

diya usne.

Sardian aain to laya keeno

mere liye,

Keeno kha ke chilka ankhon

mein nichor diya usne.

Bewafai ki hadd bhi dikha di

ek din usne Zalim !!

Milne ghar gaya to peeche

kutta chor diya usne.. ;p

Call Message

Unknown Call...

He : Do you have boyfriend ?

She : Yes, who are you ?

He : I am your brother ! Just

wait till I come home !! :)

... ...

Another unknown call...

He : Do you have a boyfriend ?

She : No no, I don't !

He : What ? :-O I am your boyfriend,

you just break my heart.

She : No no no darling I am sorry

I thought you are my brother.

He : Right ! I am your brother !

Just wait till I come home, I'll show

you later. :D

Film Message

Arbaaz khan is making a

sequel of Dabangg.

Staring :

Emran hashmi

Malika Sherawat

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And the Film name is :

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Palangg :D

Invitation Message

Invitation for

Bar B Q Dinner :

Dear Friends,

You are invited at

* Some text missing *

Thanks :)

Jab pura sms aa jaye to

aa jana.

Koi bahana nahi chalega ;p